The Centrality Of The Gospel In Marriage Part 1

Just how “practical” is the gospel to everyday life, anyway? I mean, it’s great to know the gospel for those special occasions when I can witness to my unsaved friends and relatives, but does the gospel make any difference in my everyday life?

There’s probably nothing more “everyday” than life in the context of the family. Does the gospel make any practical difference in my life as a follower of Jesus Christ as I live in day-by-day relationship to the other people in my family – as I live in daily relationship with my spouse? Just how connected is the gospel of Jesus Christ to how I live my normal, everyday life as a husband or wife?

My wife, Gladine, and I read a wonderful book together entitled, Love that Lasts: When Marriage Meets Graceby Gary and Betsy Ricucci. The Ricuccis propose:

When we grasp the depth of God=s love for us revealed in the gospel, when we rest in the joy of God=s forgiveness toward us in the gospel, when we experience God=s transforming power in us through the gospel, and when we begin to emulate the pattern of humility and obedience we see in the gospel, what a wonderful difference this will make in our lives and marriages! Nothing is more essential to a marriage, and nothing brings more hope, than applying the gospel of Jesus Christ (page 23, emphasis added).

Curious? Stick with me! Today we want to see 1) the Gospel Purpose of Marriage, 2) the Gospel Power of Marriage and 3) The Gospel Pattern of Marriage.

THE GOSPEL PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE

Have you ever thought of Jesus as a “Husband?” Many people probably haven’t. After all, He was a bachelor, wasn’t He? It’s true that during the 33 years Jesus spent physically on this earth, He never married. Yet, in Ephesians 5:25-33, Paul pictures Jesus as a Husband and the church as His bride. In fact, Paul calls this a “mystery” in verse 32. He says, “This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church.”I’m not sure what comes to your mind when you hear the word “mystery,” but that word was used differently in the Bible than the way it is used in our own day in movies and novels. As British pastor Dr. D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones explained, “But, thank God, the use of the term ‘mystery’ in the New Testament never carries the idea that it is something which cannot be understood at all. ‘Mystery’ means something that is inaccessible to the unaided mind. It doesn’t matter how great that mind may be.”1 “Mystery” doesn’t refer to something that is “unknowable,” but rather to something that will not be known to humans unless God chooses to pull back the curtains and reveal it. New Testament scholar Harold Hoehner has clarified, “A ‘mystery’ is something which was hidden in God and which humans could not unravel by their own ingenuity or study but is revealed by God for all believers to understand.”2

What was not seen in Old Testament times but has now been revealed by God through the Apostle Paul is that Christ is the Husband to His wife, the church. John Piper expounded, “So marriage is like a metaphor or an image or a picture or a parable or a model that stands for something more than a man and a woman becoming one flesh. It stands for the relationship between Christ and the church. That’s the deepest meaning of marriage. It’s meant to be a living drama of how Christ and the church relate to each other.”3

If you consider the implications of this “mystery,” the stakes involved in living as husband and wife just got higher. We must study Christ as the Model Husband to His bride, the church, not only so that we can grow in our own husband and wife roles and have happier marriages, but also so that we can be better “reflectors” of Christ. Each of our marriages, though imperfect, is to be a picture — a living drama — to the watching world of the loving relationship between Christ and the church. In Loving Your Wife as Christ Loves the Church I wrote, “To some degree, what the world thinks of Christ and the church will come from what they see in us” (McCall, 9).   They will see how our marriages mirror His relationship with His church as the ultimate marriage prototype. So, devoting ourselves to the study of Christ as the Perfect Husband and the church as His bride should bear fruit not only in our own marriages, but it also should serve to draw people’s attention to Christ. That is the gospel purpose of marriage!

To be Continued next week.

1. D. M. Lloyd-Jones, Life in the Spirit: An Exposition of Ephesians 5:18 to 6:9 (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Baker Book House, 1973), 184.
2. Harold W. Hoehner, Ephesians: An Exegetical Commentary (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Baker Academic, 2002), 775-776.
3. John Piper, Lionhearted and Lamblike: The Christian Husband as Head, Part 1, Ephesians 5:21-5:33, a sermon preached at Bethlehem Baptist Church of Minneapolis, MN, March 2007.

Recommended resources on Gospel-Centered Marriages:

1. When Sinners Say “I Do” by Dave Harvey
2. Love that Lasts by Gary and Betsy Ricucci
3. Loving Your Wife as Christ Loves the Church by Larry E. McCall
4. Each for the Other by Bryan and Kathy Chapell

Larry McCall, the author of Grandparenting with Grace: Living the Gospel with Next Generation as well as Loving Your Wife as Christ Loves the Church and Walking Like Jesus serves as the director of Walking Like Jesus Ministries. Larry was gripped by God’s saving grace at an early age and had the amazing privilege of being discipled by his parents and by other mentors in his home church. In 1975 Larry married Gladine, his sweetheart since high school days. They have three married children and seven much-loved grandchildren. Larry has had the joy of serving on the pastoral team of Christ’s Covenant Church of Winona Lake, Indiana since 1981. He is a graduate of Grace College, Grace Theological Seminary and has a Doctor of Ministry degree from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. He gets his batteries charged in serving Christ’s followers through his speaking and writing ministry, helping them see in clear, practical, gospel-centered ways how to pursue Christ and reflect him in daily life. 

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