Culture of Softness
by The Addisons
Published on March 21, 2024

Culture of Softnes

“If you are a culture watcher like I am there are many concerning things that are evident. One of these things is the softening of almost everything that was at one time rugged or tough. From things like sports to the constant offense taken when there’s disagreement, we see almost every area of culture opposing toughness, masculinity, robust conversations and disagreement with civility.”

 The move towards softness, fragility and weakness is all by design by the evil one. This principle is true in community, homes, churches, organizations, companies etc. The truth of the straight edge of scripture:

 “Or else how can one enter into a strong man’s house, and spoil his goods, except he first bind the strong man? and then he will spoil his house.” (Matthew 12:29)

 The strength of this country has been bound. Men and the strength we bring are not valued in today’s America, and our families, our churches and our nation have reaped the consequences. Praise God that He’s called His Church to be countercultural

We have a culture of softness in America and it’s by design. For years now the attack on masculinity, patriarchy, ruggedness, toughness has been constant. These are certainly not the only defining features of being a man. Men don’t have to be rugged and tough in the world’s eyes to be manly, but there is a sense of leadership and strength with which God equips men that is useful in human society. The move has been towards androgyny. The push has been many genders or no genders at all, moving away from God’s design of male and female, but God will NOT be mocked!

Conversations over how soft sports are now compared to a few years ago occur frequently. While this may be a harmless conversation, it points to a steady, notable decline of toughness and our society’s quiet acceptance. Actions that are called fouls today would never have been called in the past. They say it’s all done to protect the players, but the fallout is that the game is softer.

Giving participation trophies is another feature of softness. We have an atmosphere now where no one can lose. This is not healthy. What builds character is losing, taking the loss and coming back next time trying harder.

We might not have ever seen a Michael Jordan if he hadn’t been left off of the Varsity team. Yes, Jordan went home and cried, but we know the end of the story.

When I was in school, anxiety occurred when you failed a test. You felt bad, but were encouraged to study harder for the next test or face the same results. No one saw a need for therapy or some label due to the fear of failure. Failure often built character and made a tougher, more resilient and more independent person.

We live in a time where disagreement is tantamount to assault. The old sayings were, “I will agree to disagree with you,” or “I respect and would fight for your right to disagree with me.” Today, the response to disagreement is to establish safe spaces. Universities are full of young people who can’t handle being questioned, and disagreeing speech is seen as violence.

As it concerns sexuality things trend towards softness. Masculinity is toxic and unless you are a woman trying to act like a man, men being manly is not celebrated. This is a problem.

When there is a culture of softness, nations are weakened and can be overcome.

 “Or else how can one enter into a strong man’s house, and spoil his goods, except he first bind the strong man? and then he will spoil his house.” (Matthew 12:29)

 When strength is bound, defeat is imminent.

China’s government understands the danger in a culture of softness, banning effeminate men on TV.

For men to be men is both godly and biblical.

 “ Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. 14 All that you do must be done in love.15 Now I urge you, brothers and sisters: you know the household of Stephanas, that [e]they are the first fruits of Achaia, and that they have devoted themselves to ministry to the [f]saints; 16 I urge that you also be subject to such as these and to everyone who helps in the work and labors. 17 I rejoice over the [g]coming of Stephanas, Fortunatus, and Achaicus, because they have [h]supplied what was lacking on your part. 18 For they have refreshed my spirit and yours. Therefore, acknowledge such men.” (1 Corinthians 16:13-18)

Although Paul is talking to men and women in this text when he says “Act like Men” is the word andrizo – to behave like a man, to play the man.

This admonishment that Paul gave to the Corinthian church still rings loud for us today! While surrounded by a culture that moves away from men being men and acting like men, the straight up call is to say to the church, “Let’s act like men!”

“When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things.” (1 Corinthians 13:11)

The call here is to be both mature and manly, and being manly, if you are indeed a man is a good thing in the economy of God.


Wil Addison is a New Orleans native with over 25 years of ministry service. Wil has served as a missionary and missionary evangelist to America’s colleges and universities. He was a nationally appointed home missionary for six years. As associate pastor in Lafayette, LA, Wil’s focus was discipleship and prayer. After accepting a position with American Family Association in 2008, Wil served at the ministry for 15 years in various capacities; from Director of Urban Family Communications, Director of Special Initiatives and Director of the Marriage Family Life Conference – a conference birthed from his heart for discipleship and equipping Christian families. Today, Wil’s focus is homeschooling his six children and stewarding Straight Edge Ministries and Culture Proof. He can be heard via podcast on the Culture Proof Podcast. On their podcast, the Addison’s observe cultural trends and explore their effects on the foundation of Biblical morality. Together the couple offers insights on culture, popular trends, and current events that threaten the integrity of the Christian faith and the proliferation of the gospel. With the highest esteem for the local Church, Wil serves as an elder in the fellowship he is helping to plant in Tupelo, Mississippi.


Featured Photo by Ron Lach from


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